implications-i-am-pondering

Implications I Am Pondering

How does the healing and growth I experience on this side of the transition door impact what happens on the other side?  Jesus told us to lay up treasures in heaven, letting us know that what we do here impacts the quality of our eternal destiny.

God is eternal and will exist forever.  I entered into the eternal world at the instant of my conception.  I will have all eternity, starting on this side of the transition door and on into infinity, to keep on learning, growing, exploring and developing- never getting close to catching up with the magnitude of God’s knowledge, skill, creativity, capacity and ability.

I, being finite, am made in the image of the infinite God!  Included in the design woven into my unique reflection, with all my limitations, I have character traits that reflect His.  I have skills and the ability to learn and create.  The capacity to feel a spectrum of emotions.  For all eternity.

With this in mind, what are the implications for the amount of my growth in the ‘here and now’ and what happens on the other side as we step through the transition door.

Here is one example that comes to mind. As infants we are supposed to live in an environment in which we are comfortable receiving.  Comfortable asking for what we need.  But I grew up with a sense that my needs were an inconvenience to others.  That I was expected to be stronger than I was and to take care of myself beyond what is appropriate.  I developed a life stance of being overly independent. This is a problem I have been working on for years.  It is incompatible to letting go of control and being dependent on God to care for me.  Incompatible for relaxing into the care of my Good Shepherd.  My defenses go up easily without my recognizing it, and my instinct to be strong and self-reliant becomes my default.

How does this impact my ability to receive others and their offers of care into my life?  How does this play out into growing my capacity for “fullness of joy” by being loved on?  Including our God, the Giver of all good gifts?!

If I have developed a ‘thimble size’ ability to receive, how will this impact my ability to receive the extravagant love of God when I am embraced by Him on the other side of the time door?   I will be filled and overwhelmed with His love.  But would I experience it differently if I had developed a capacity of 10 gallons rather than a thimble size?  I will be filled to overflowing regardless.  But the experience will be different.

God has emotions that are over- the- top big!  He sings and dances with joy over those He loves.  He is a jealous God.  He is angry with injustice and claims that vengeance is His!  He stands up against those who oppress the vulnerable.  He weeps with those who weep.  He rejoices when truth wins out, and when lost sheep are found.  He has great compassion and grief when people choose to reject His care.

If our eternal God has emotions, why won’t I?  On both sides of the time door.  The idea that there will only be ‘happy’ emotions, I believe, is a fairy tale based on our wishes and limited thinking.  Why would my emotions stop? The eternal joy does not stop.  The martyrs in heaven are agonizing as they ask God, “How long, oh Lord?” as they watch citizens of earth being tormented for their loyalty for God. If the ‘cloud of witnesses’ have emotions, why won’t I?  If God has a full range of emotions regarding His loved ones and what happens on earth, then why won’t I?

I won’t be diminished, emotionally limited or become one dimensional.

I am certain that God has wanted me to grow my capacity to have intense emotions and regulate them so that I can stay relationally connected in the mix of them regardless of any situation that I encounter.  I suspect that the growth I have accomplished in the here and now will benefit me on the other side.  I do not know what this really means.  But I do know there is some kind of eternal benefit as I heal and grow now.

I will have so much to keep on learning and developing when I enter eternity with my eternal God.  And I want to keep on investing eternally in my healing, growth and development in the now.

6 Comments

  1. Anne L on January 10, 2019 at 10:10 pm

    It’s so interesting that I am reading this tonight. I just wrote in my journal 2 hours ago:
    “God, I’m not really able to connect with You very deeply….I think part of it is not wanting to go deep…..Remembering painful times of going deep and not wanting to go back to it…..I had so many feelings when I was in so much pain….I don’t know how You want to relate. Do You want to go deeper? Are emotions important to You? What does going deep with You look like? I’m functioning well. I seem to be growing and maturing and moving in a positive direction….I’m so thankful for the changes I see. Maybe I just need to keep trusting You. Keep trusting that You are at work….God You know I am afraid of eternity….It scares me so much. What will I do forever? Forever….? Oh God I want to know You. I want to know You. I want to love You.”

    I don’t know if I have a thimble size capacity or 10 gallons or somewhere in between. It scares me to think I might be disappointed when I die that I didn’t go deeper. But I don’t know what else I can do. I don’t know how to force myself to go deeper.

    How are you Maribeth? It’s nice to reconnect……

    • Maribeth Poole on January 11, 2019 at 8:51 am

      Anne- thanks for taking time to read my pondering, and taking time to respond! It is a “no little deal” of encouragement to me! I resonated with your interaction with our God… and am asking our Good Shepherd to please keep on doing what He does best- loving in ways that can draw us into His diving embrace of love!

  2. Elizabeth Cagle on January 15, 2019 at 1:52 pm

    Hi Maribeth! I do not know you personally although I have seen you teach at a conference where they allowed people who were not there to view the teachings. A friend of mine, Sue woodcock, was there and brought back pages of notes from that teaching. I hope to meet you and some of the others one day…on this side of eternity. I am writing now because I can relate to what you saying in your blog and to what Anne is saying. In my journaling earlier today as I prepared for my Thursday Journey group, I wrote about how inadequate my efforts toward God seem to me at times and He answered that He knows me better than I know myself and He understands better too. He said that Journey Group is His way of being able to initiate interactions with me that I need greatly in order to connect with Him here and now. “This is my opportunity to minister to you in a way tha you have not initiated. It’s like when you have an encounter with a loved one that you did not initiate but they did.” It is so important to know that one is desired by the other. And He is the One who truly desires us in ways others do not have capacity to do or continue. Help me Lord to allow my capacity to grow to receive your desire to be with me in order to increase my desire for You! Amen. Thank you Maribeth and Anne!

    • Maribeth Poole on January 15, 2019 at 3:04 pm

      Thank you, Elizabeth, for taking the time to write. To bring me into your life and journey a bit! And to encourage me with your response! I do not take it lightly. Yes, it would be enjoyable to meet you on this side of the transition door! I’m glad we are both on journey’s that are ‘investments’ into our eternal on-going life with our Precious God and others!!! Tailored blessings to you!

  3. Kara on January 18, 2019 at 6:39 am

    Regulate my emotions?🤭😀It’s been one of “those” weeks and attempts to regulate the various emotions are challenging to say the least😀I absolutely love how our Father speaks HIS love through you Maribeth! Being reminded that HE sings and dances over those HE loves with JOY made me smile and comforted my soul. THANK YOU for this beautiful reminder 💕

    • Maribeth Poole on January 18, 2019 at 8:35 am

      Good morning, Kara!
      Good to hear from you…. and caring about the reasons that sent you on an emotional roller coaster. I sincerely look forward to the other side of the transition door to discover the remarkable benefits for growing here so as to invest there! Into our connection with our God and our eternal future!

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